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Monthly Archives: August 2012

When I was a little girl my mother would snuggle with my sister and I and we would pretend we were baby birds and she the mama bird would pretend to feed us worms.  I still feel warm and cozy as I think of the game we would play.  Years later when I was in high school I noticed she had a ornament sized mama bird on a perch with her two little baby on a shelf near our kitchen sink.  While I never asked her, I knew that ornament reminded her of us and the game we use to play.

My mother died while I was in college and long before I had my own baby birds.  Over the years they have heard  my stories of my mama and her baby birds as we would snuggle together.   And the ornament is on display shelf reminding me of them and of my mother.

As my last birdie prepares to head 1200 miles east to college, I again think of my Mother and how lonely she felt her baby birds headed 1200 miles west.  She never made it to the next chapter.  I pray that I can find mine.

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There has been many things said about truth, so I am going to give my opinion on it.  When I was young I was often guilty of what I would call “fish stories”.  My 15 pound trout, caught on the 4th of July off Michigan Island when I was 13 , became 20 pounds and similarly I “rounded up” most of the other stories about my life.  I don’t think most people knew, because my rounding was about small stuff, stuff that only I knew.  But that is exactly the point, I did know the truth and with every “round up” I was left with the feeling that the truth and therefore me was not quite good enough.  So now I make it a point to tell the truth about not only the big stuff but also the small stuff and that habit as done more than anything in my life to help me feel good about myself.  

The that is what the New York Times said about building the Panama Canal.  Based on the number of failed attempts and lives lost, I don’t think there was much charm in the adventure of building the Panama Canal but I do feel the charm of adventure about this blog and my quest to think slowly and to focus deeply.  Today I focused on five things.  Is that too many?  I completed one of the five and the other tasks have no end.  I ran. I worked on job references.  I organized the kids finances.  I transplanted perennials.  I started a diet.  I also saw no one.  

I think the internet is fuel for natural curiosity.  I am always searching the internet to explore everything from how to divide perennials to college rankings to politics.  But as broad as this knowledge is, it is also shallow.  I find myself reading less and jumping quickly from one thing to another.  Much like how I troll the internet.  But instead of this broad band of knowing, I want my knowledge to be deep.  I want to know less about more than things and more about less things.  I want to think slower in the Teton and thus the goal of my blog!